Not Dead Yet!

In the hilarious comedy "Monty Python and the Holy Grail" people taken for dead keep popping up saying "Not quite dead, yet!" That's what we should call Osama's latest audio tape.

When Zawahiri's video came out late last year, everyone wondered aloud why it wasn't Osama. The most recent audio tape, if it is indeed Osama, was al Qaeda's panicked response to the growing suspicion that he is either dead or otherwise out of the picture. It was a feeble attempt to convince Osama's followers that the old ghoul is still kicking and in the game, along with some longwinded excuses for why they haven't managed a terrorist hit in the U.S. for over four years now. These things take planning you know. So don't lose heart, terrorists.

Only one thing. Why no video? If Osama were still alive, wouldn't he want his believers to see his saintly face? Wouldn't he want to yet again rub all our noses in it?

No. My guess is Osama is now dead or looking so beat up from four years of life on the run, that showing his face would shock or demoralize the true believers even more than they must be now.

The only thing that really irks me is all the press the damned thing generated. One whole day of nonstop breathless reportage and analysis! It's sickening. The guy just doesn't deserve it and this tape doesn't warrant it. If a business could get such coverage from airing one lousy audiotape they could be selling dung on a stick and still make the fortune 500.

Must be a slow news cycle.